The contradictory media messages, even paradoxical, make many parents think that to have a child changes nothing in their lives. However, to grow, the baby requires initially that is established a narrow dependence between him and his/her parents, so that, in the second time, he can take his autonomy. With through its experiment clinical and a review of a certain number of media messages, the author shows how much certain adults are in lack of reference, which prevents them from correctly transmitting the limits essential to child education. The concept of "extimity" and the problems of the sexualisation of the culture are also approached. Lastly, media used by children (video games and internet) are analyzed. A strategy of parentality assistance is then proposed.