A new two-parameter count distribution is derived starting with probabilistic arguments around the gamma function and the digamma function. This model is a generalization of the Poisson model with a noteworthy assortment of qualities. For example, the mean is the main model parameter; any possible non-trivial variance or zero probability can be attained by changing the other model parameter; and all distributions are visually natural-shaped. Thus, exact modeling to any degree of over/under-dispersion or zero-inflation/deflation is possible.