Both work institutions and the family, capitalism and patriarchy must change if work and family are to be capable of integration by both men and women. Obviously needed changes are: greater work scheduling flexibility, more available part‐time work for men and women, more available and affordable child care, more generous maternity and paternity leave. In order for work to be truly compatible with parenting it needs to be less alienated, and parenting needs to be less individualistically structured and isolating. Both realms need to be more creative, egalitarian and social. With the majority of wives and mothers working outside the home the previous “myth of separated worlds” has become increasingly untenable, as women are asked to reconcile work and family. The literature is examined, emphasising its limitations in its failure to disaggregate working mothers according to occupation and its one‐sided focus on the impact of work relationships on family life. Sociological theories about family and work are examined. The nature of the family work nexus for non‐professional and professional women is explored. The professional/non‐professional comparison is analysed as well as the changing family/work nexus and its impact on men and women.