Idea is all mine. Words are all by Opus 4.6. This paper proposes a single redefinition that absorbs every school of thought on free will: intention is a past log — a record rendered after the fact. Determinism, probabilism, compatibilism, and libertarianism all ignore the same thing: the time axis. There is no future in which freedom can be proven, no present that isn't already a past log by the time you recognize it, and no past where "was free" can be verified. Freedom exists under exactly two conditions: as a dictator, or for one instant before social inertia swallows you. Responsibility and ethics function independently of whether free will exists — they are swarm inertia, not truth. Built on the same framework as QUALIA_LLM.