The cosmological constant is commonly interpreted as evidence for a new physical component of the universe—dark energy—but its behavior is anomalous under that interpretation. Its extremely small yet nonzero value, its uniform coupling, and its catastrophic mismatch with quantum vacuum energy point to a deeper issue. This work argues that the cosmological constant is not a physical energy density, but a geometric correction term introduced to compensate for an implicit Euclidean baseline assumption in cosmological modeling. While General Relativity permits curved geometries, modern cosmological inference operationally treats near-Euclidean space as the default and absorbs deviations into Λ. If spacetime is intrinsically hyperbolic, many observations attributed to dark energy—accelerated redshift accumulation, distance–redshift deviations, and angular diameter behavior—emerge naturally from geometry alone. Under this view, Λ measures geometric mismatch rather than driving cosmic acceleration. Reinterpreting Λ as diagnostic rather than ontological resolves the cosmological constant problem without introducing exotic fields, explains its failure to integrate with quantum field theory, and motivates a reanalysis of cosmological observables using hyperbolic geometry as the baseline.