This paper seeks to develop a queer approach to the study of personal relationships. In the context of the significant transformations in the organization of personal life which have taken place over the past thirty years, it argues that sociologists must de-centre the family and the heterosexual couple in our intellectual imaginaries. The paper first provides a critique of sociology for the heteronormative frameworks within which it has studied personal relationships. It then goes on to propose an extension of the framework for the analysis of contemporary transformations of intimacy, arguing for the importance of a queer analysis of social change, and suggests that there is a need for research focusing on those living at the cutting edge of social change. It ends with an overview of the findings of recent research on the relationship practices of those who are living and loving beyond the heteronorm.